Fast calm...

'Everything you do can be done better from a place of relaxation'
-Stephen C Paul

What ever lies inside the minds of those who protest in a line at the supermarket, bank, or waiting in a traffic jam? How about in those of people who, as soon as a light turns green, honk the horn several times?

What is their desperation? What's so important that they sacrifice their inner peace time and time again to really achieve nothing. They don't seem to be content with their discontent, but they also disturb others with their behavior.

Patience is a virtue. It is defined as 'the state of endurance under difficult circumstances, persevering in the face of delay or provocation without being annoyed'.
In Spanish the word is composed of Paz-ciencia (the science of peace).
Just as a science, inner peace and calm should be studied, understood, cultivated, promoted and practiced.

If you find yourself in a hurry stop for a moment. Stope reflecting that aura of unhappiness to those around. Even better, look at the face of someone else in a similar circumstance and just smile.
Don't take a part in promoting this behavior.

Instead of quickly getting disturbed, quickly reach that state of calmness.

Like a sensei, teach others this powerful lesson.

Lesson learned: When life's light turns green don't rush in. Just relax, take your time, and enjoy the ride peacefully.

Obstacle course...

What one decides to do in crisis depends on one's philosophy of life, and that philosophy cannot be changed by an incident. If one hasn't any philosophy in crises, others make the decision.
- Jeannette Rankin


And yet we face another wall one more time. We have fought so hard to achieve one goal and after so many struggles we see the road closed.
A road closed does not mean there is no way. It just represents a temporary hardship, a delay in our plans.

How do you face a seemingly insurmountable problem?

What is your mindset?

Abortionists: A plan that doesn’t work must be abandoned; they change their mind, choose another way and go somewhere else. In the abortionist mindset this is not cowardice, there’s so much to do it’s not even worth spending energy in an obstacle.

Martyrs: They see every obstacle as a personal affront. Martyrs believe obstacles are there to defeat the martyr. But he will survive, with pain(real or imagined) and let everyone know of his struggle.

Victims: Obstacles were created specifically and only for them, like everything else in the world. Victims will surrender, give up, lie down and cry in waiting for someone to rescue them from the ‘claws of the evil obstacle’.

Survivors: Out of fear of what ‘could’ happen, survivors stand in front of the obstacle. They see in the obstacle what they themselves lack. ‘If you can’t defeat it, join it’ is their mentality. In the end they kneel before the obstacle and worship it, they join its forces and become ‘one’ with the obstacle.

Frat boys: In their mind, the main reason why an obstacle can’t be overcome is because you faced it alone. The frat boys bring along people, sometimes a lot of people. With a combined effort any obstacle can be overcome…and a celebration must follow, of course.

Juggernauts: No obstacle is too big or too strong. Nothing is stronger than a Juggernaut’s strength of will. They will back away and, without fear, they will run towards the obstacle to destroy it.

Knights: The knight may not be able to overcome the obstacle, but he is honor bound to stand his ground and not let himself be overcome by the obstacle either. Even if he stays on a standstill he will wait. One day the obstacle will fall, and the knight will still be standing.

Monks: These ascetics believe there is a reason why there is an obstacle. An obstacle is a part of everything. It should be studied, understood, accepted, and ultimately taught to others.

Preachers: Prechers believe they shouldn't be facing any obstacles. Obstacles are for others. They are very willing to mention it at every opportunity, just as eager as they are to help, guide and even order others to overcome the obstacles they would never face themselves.

Strategists: Sometimes one must back away from the hardship, these believe, only to see it from a distance and contemplate. They then plan, search a way, and they use all their efforts to confront the problem differently. Each obstacle is seen as a challenge, as an opportunity to test their wit.


Who are you? How do you face a problem?
Do you face problems, or do you let problems face you?

Life is full of difficulties. Life is not without struggles. When you are struggling to stay afloat you can think one of two things…I can give up and die, or I can fight on and live…


Lesson learned: A roadblock at the end of our road is not the end of the road.

Candle's light...

Every man dies. Not every man really lives.
William Wallace

No matter how busy our lives can be, a day of reflection comes every year.
At least once we can’t help it but reflect in things past.

Have we achieved our goals for this year?
Have we saved as much as we wanted to?
Have we made up peace with someone?
Have we gotten a raise?
Have we meditated enough?

Those can be truly important things to reflect upon…but if those ARE the important things we do reflect upon, then our lives are nothing more than a flicker of a candle waiting to be extinguished.

How many lives have you touched?
How many lives have you changed?
How many have you influenced in a good way?

If you died today…how worth living was your life?
Will you be remembered?
How will you be remembered; or will you fade in the ocean of faces unknown, a specter to be dismissed and exorcised forever from this World when his sentence is due.


Lesson learned: Shine bright as the sun and your life will be worth living.

Falling leaves...

To: Jeff, I am with you in these tough times, my friend...


When the last leaf falls,
When the last breeze leaves,
I’ll be there for you again,
You’ll be there again with me,

When the last leaf falls,
When the fall does leave,
Memories will stay,
They will reign supreme,

When the last leaf falls,
When the last star shines,
Endless time will stop,
It will let us be,
Losing all control,
And its icy grasp,
Hurrying every step,
Of our so called life

When the last leaf falls,
And your earth turns dry,
When there are no tears,
For there’s only peace

When the last leaf falls,
And I’m no more a child,
When our hair turns gray,
Our dreams not as wild

When the last leaf falls
When my eyes do close
You will wait for me
When my last leaf falls…

Inglorious glorification...

'For my part, I consider that it will be found much better by all parties to leave the past to history, especially as I propose to write that history myself.'
-Winston Churchill

What has been the greatest of achievements you've had in your life so far?

Many people have done great things...
Others think or feel they have done great things...

What matters is not how big or small, rather than it was a glorious moment. Sometimes we feel everyone needs to know about it that moment.

Why?

It is because we unconsciously believe that is THE ONE greatest moment. Perhaps we do unconsciously feel no other moment like this will come. And hardly another will come, for in our accepting our 'maximum' we don't strive to achieve it.
Maybe it is because in our self-depreciation we revel in the recognition from others. In any case we are as foolish, senile storytellers of old, telling all around us about what happened so long ago nobody really cares to listen.

We need to be proud of our achievements, of course. However, when those accomplishmentst tower over the way we perceive ourselves it is almost impossible to escape their shadow. We are then engulfed, kept from achieving anything greater by our own effort.

The past is passed, the past is history. It's good to know it and enjoy it, but it shouldn't rule us.
Let your glorious past be a guide to things you want to do, and do even greater things. Do not let it determine that that's your moment, and all that's left is to be forgotten...


Lesson learned: I will not be seduced by the ephemeral hands of past glories, lest I become a statue in Medusa's lair.

Ocean pacific...

Morning time, I lie awake
With no desire but to breathe
And no goal in mind but to take
A plunge in ocean deep

The constant motion
At bewitching hour
Making me prisoner
Of your heart's desire

My curse undeserved
But well received
As every day I see
Your eyes in that ocean

So as I watch the orbs
The enchanting twins
I'm at peace, feeling
Captured...
...amazed...
...enraptured

I become victim
Willing sacrifice
To sorceries eternal
Of smiling charms

I know they're near
Though they are far
So in between
All I have

...is to think

It's late at night, I lie awake
With no desire but to breathe
And no goal in mind but to take
A plunge in your eyes so deep

Pack tactic…

‘The only way to make a man trustworthy is to trust him’
-Henry Stimson



Even in our most desired independence we are but a conglomeration of characteristics of those around us. However, not the traits, but the amount of each is what define us.

And who are those that help define us? Who are those that surround us? Most importantly, who are those we surround ourselves with?

Out of those around, who can you trust? Who can you truly trust?

To many, the concept of fully trusting other people is difficult to conceive. The main excuse for not trusting others is that ‘others can hurt/disappoint me’.
There are several things to note in that last phrase:
1. What negative trait we see in others, on very many occasions, are negative traits we possess, dislike, and conveniently overlook (think of it next time you criticize someone else).
2. We are giving others the power to determine how we’ll feel.
3. Most importantly, others do not disappoint/hurt you, YOU CHOOSE to feel hurt or disappointed.
4. Time and time again has been proven that those who do not fully trust cannot be trusted themselves.

Wolves live in packs; they are the perfect example of unconditional love, respect, and complete trust. Each one understands their role in their society, and contributes his best for the betterment of the pack as a whole. Every member of the same pack, from the leader to the last one, can trust each and every wolf to do what they must to do preserve the integrity and functionality of their family, thus improving their chances of survival and success. They will surround an opponent, and the same will be defeated by being attacked only by those who can see the weak points. In the meantime the opponent is confused by the unity of the pack.
Everyone’s contribution leads the plan to fruition.

Think of who do you trust enough to have as part of the pack you call your LIFE. Who contributes something useful? Who will lead you to failure? Maybe there’s time for some changes.

Lesson learned: Surround yourself with those people you trust, and trust those people you surround yourself with.

Goal set…

'In order to reach your goal you must first define it...'
-The Puppet Master


Where were you one year ago from today?

What were you doing?

How did you feel back then?

Where were you hoping to be today?

How far from where you expected to be have you drifted?

…why?



What has become your prison?
What has seemed so strong you have surrendered and given ultimate power to rule over your life, change it, and bring you here today?

Do take some time to set a goal for yourself, see it in the horizon as a lighthouse and let it shine even in the darkest hour or torrential rain. We get caught up in so many things each day that we sometimes seem to navigate endlessly, gazing mesmerized at the many beautiful and bright stars, only to forget we were being guided. Your will fades, your strength dwindles, and then we consciously/unconsciously conform to the meager leftover of others…because it is easier in life not to struggle.

Well you don’t have to struggle. You can refocus today.
Instead of inviting someone to eat, go by yourself. Do not read a newspaper or magazine. Just sit for a brief moment, turn your cell phone off.
Write down on a piece of paper that new dream, the new goal. Think of it hardly enough, and better than that, believe it will happen, because this time you WILL make it happen.

Save that little piece of paper, and let it be your lighthouse. Nothing will deter you.
I am doing this right now, and I encourage you to do it with me.

Let us help each other achieve our goals.



Lesson learned: I will not be an unwilling obstacle, rather a willing facilitator to someone else’s growth.

Winner's circle...

‘Winning isn’t everything, it’s the only thing’
-Vince Lombardi

After a long and arduous race ends someone gets the first place. That someone is clearly joyous.
If you participated, how do you feel if you were second? How about third? Last?
‘Participation is what matters’ are the most common words echoed by all those who weren’t first place.
Why do they say so?
They do because they are not the winners. Not only are they not ‘the winners’, but they are just proving themselves time and time again that they lack what it takes to be a winner.

How do you define ‘Win’? Think of it for a second: What does it mean to you when you hear the word ‘Win’?

To Win is defined as: to finish first in a race, contest or the like. That is what most of us think of when we hear the term.
However, it is also defined as: To succeed by great effort, to be successful, and to overcome the adversary.

Most times our main adversary is within us. It is that loser within that keeps us from becoming successful, and convinces us that ‘participating’ is what matters.
When you participate you just ‘take a part of/in’. It means you are just one more.

From now on: stop looking at other’s positions in the Race of Life to determine if you’re a winner, a participant or just a loser. Look at your own position, enjoy your journey while you take part on it, and win.

Open up your eyes and hearts to a new mentality, feel like a winner; be a winner, and BECOME A WINNER. It will move you one step closer to your ultimate happiness.

Lesson learned: There can be no losing in the road to happiness, for even those who pass away are not lost, for they are still within us.

Singled out...

If love conquers all...then conquer yourself and rule the world!
-The Puppet Master

Isn’t it great to have someone else?


Think of waking up in the morning to see your loved one’s face as they sleep at peace. It gives us a sense of warmth, of love that is being the reflection of our own emotion.

Think of the beautiful smile of that other half, and how it has(and continues to) brightened your many days and the laughter many nights.

Think of that calming touch of that someone who has dispelled all fears with but a single caress.

Think of the watery eyes of our loved one when they gaze at our own unable to hide their hurting, and think of how you can’t help it but disarm yourself when you love that someone’s eyes.

Isn’t it great to have someone else?
Someone asked me today: How can you be single? There must be something very wrong with you…

To many, being alone is a dreadful nightmare.
Being alone is not, but can definitely be…


Why is being single so negative? Or better…why does it seem so?


As a human race, our goal in life is to be fruitful and reproduce, to be successful, and to be with someone. It is just because we are misdirected.
In that desperation we seek others that have their own ‘baggage’ of problems, and we seek to ‘love through helping others’ rather than ‘helping others though love’.

Our goal should be to love ourselves, to be happy with ourselves.
That will stop us from looking in someone else for that which we are lacking. We will truly be able to fall in love, and find that someone who instead of ‘completing us’ will ‘complement us’.

Lesson learned: Isn’t it great to have someone else? It certainly is, when that someone is worth it…