Ironic contradictions...

(to my friend Tean-Su)


Along the winding road
Comes smiling
The eastern western
The western eastern
The small giant
Of contradictions

With spirit like hyena
The rowdy laughter
Of a drunken man
Or a happy one
Enriching aura
To saddened souls

But all I know
Is you brought me
A reason to smile
Despite your sadness

So here I am
My loyal friend
I owe so much
You can’t imagine



Now take my hand
I'll walk with you
For you have helped
Without request


My sentient sun
Oh friendly clown
Eastern western
Little giant
Of the western east
Of contradictions

Iron man…

‘Stand strong, stand firm, and nothing will sway you’
-Some idiot

We remember those words of our fathers, or forefathers saying ‘be strong, be firm, and you will reach your goal in the end’. When you stand firm you are like a lighthouse in a stormy shore, a monument to persistence.
Now that sets me to think. Is this the best way to progress in life? Is this the road to becoming a better person? I honestly think it certainly isn’t.
A lighthouse, thought bright, sits alone amidst the storms and beating of the waves. It can do nothing but stay there, in waiting, until its foundation falls from underneath it by the power of change. It will then be nothing but a memory of distant past.

Whereas it’s good to be firm in your convictions, it’s best to be smart, to study, to read situations carefully and adapt.
Adaptation is defined as the changes in an individual organism over the course of its existence that makes it more suited to the environment. Adaptation does then help one survive.
Not only that, adaptation does let you not just go by in life, it helps you enjoy it with minimal struggle. Difficulties we have, hardships we live through, but we shouldn’t struggle, we should live and enjoy our life with its ups and downs.
Athletes train hard, day by day, and they certainly become strong enough to reach their desired goal. In order to become stronger, however, they need to adapt. They modify their programs so that they may be able to perform better.

Many people say ‘this is the way I am, and whoever doesn’t like it, can **** himself’.

Sad, isn’t it, that with so many advances today, with so much to see and experience in the World there are those who still want to be Iron Men; these unwavering, unflinching, unyielding “strong” people who can withstand any and all things.

Lesson learned: Every Iron Man, in time, gets rusty

Twin blue...

(to Casey)

Once again they appear
Before me
Seeking understanding
Awakening from deep slumber
Hypnotizing dance
Of identical twins
Mesmerizing those who fall
Under their spell

They glare
They study
And hide high
Up in the sky
Their camouflage
Blue as a shallow sea
The irony of glacier blue
Kindling my flame

Even the sun’s
Attempt in vain
To bar the door
And close the entrance
So my soul can be saved
From that trap
That twin bluebirds
So stealthily placed

Silent hunters searching
They find me
And drain my strength
So in my weakness
I become
A victim
A statue
Under medusa’s reign

No mercy shown
I am devoured
I am aflame
I am sacrifice
I am full
And captivated
By the blue Danube
Of your eyes

Silence speaks...

‘If you really knew yourself you’d never feel alone’
-The Puppet Master

Try to recall the last time you sat alone in quiescence…

Was there ever a time where you left the noises of daily life behind to immerse yourself in deep thought? You probably can’t even remember.

Why…
Do we turn the tv on while we’re cooking on our own?
Do we listen to the radio when we’re in the shower?
Do we yearn for a partner, or roommate, or friend to come by?
Or oftentimes we go out of our homes to see more people?
We have come to fear being alone.

Why do we fear being by ourselves? Maybe because we are afraid of what our conscience will reveal to us about ourselves.
Or probably because we confuse loneliness with solitude…

Loneliness is the emotional state in which a person experiences a powerful feeling of isolation and emptiness. It involves a feeling of being cut off, disconnected and alienated from others.

Now, solitude is a state of seclusion or isolation that may stem from deliberate choice. Short term solitude can often be valued as a time where one may work, think or rest without being disturbed. It may be desired for the sake of privacy.

Take some time to be with yourself, to learn yourself and love yourself. Do not read, do not sing, just be…
Sit in front of the beach, gaze into the horizon, and let your mind wander. Try not to force yourself to think of something, do not even force your mind to go blank as in ‘meditation’. Do not act like someone, do not act like something else, just be…

By being yourself, and knowing yourself you will be able to change what you must change to do what you must do.

And you will grow, in silence…



Lesson learned: Do not fear your own consciousness, for doing so you’ll fear yourself and thus, you will never be at peace.

Boomerang effect…

'Give...and you shall receive'

-Anonymous

How do you define giving?

A gift is the transferring of something without the need for compensation. It is a voluntary act requiring nothing in return. Even when, socially, it involves expectation or reciprocity, be it in the form of prestige or power, a gift is meant to be free.

Voluntary…what is it? It means of our own, free will.

What have you given to the world? What have you given to others? To life?
Selfishly (or many thereof) you may have lived for yourself, for self-gratification, in order to ‘enjoy life to its fullest’. In other words, you may have been but an immature child.

In some Asian countries giving has become a form of art. Just the act itself, the unselfishness involved, and the sacrifice made has even become a fundamental part of Buddhism.

It is curious, that even when we recognize we should give expecting nothing in return, our very human nature sets us to think of how we will directly or indirectly benefit from the act.

There are those who think that somehow the universe is connected, and the energy you spend (or send) you will receive back. Is it really so? Who knows, and discussing these beliefs goes beyond the scope of this blog, at least for now.

Some others believe that you give, and you perform acts of good, and you won’t necessarily get something good back.

Why would we complicate our lives thinking about such things? Why will we trouble ourselves with such trivialities?

Give…
Give your knowledge…
Give yourself…
And only expect back the gratification that you are doing the best you can for others. Just realizing that you had the power to hold something back, yet you decided to become part of all that is good, and that your contribution helped make a good thing will be the best reward you get.


Lesson learned: ‘A boomerang rewards you by not returning when it hits the desired prey. If it returns it accomplished nothing, it may be aiming for your head.’

Inactivating inaction...

‘If we would each contribute a small grain of sand we would make a beautiful beach for the enjoyment of all’
-The Puppet Master


Save the whales!
Save the trees!
Save the wolves…the ozone layer…the rivers…the hippos…the bald eagles…the polar bears…

We’re so eager to save the World…yet we destroy it every day with our ignorance, with our indifference.

How much time have you spent in the last month reading articles about the Greenhouse Effect, about the contamination and endangered species? How much time have you dedicated to be sitting in front of the television, watching the news or documentaries on the planet’s current situation?

It is important to educate the self, you may say. I, for one, am not going to argue that.
What I do have to ask you is this ‘HOW MUCH TIME HAVE YOU SPENT ACTUALLY DOING SOMETHING ABOUT IT?’

Easy, it is, to just sit down behind a desk sending ‘some help’ (in the best of scenarios) to those braver than us, those with the willingness to act.

Remove that crown adorning your head, intensifying the illusion of that fantasy world where everything revolves around you. Grab your sword and be a knight that fights for all of us, and let’s walk side by side, for the betterment of all.


Lesson learned: Caring is not enough, in itself, at least. Action is what gets things done.

Spiritual autobiography...

‘Our lives are open books waiting for an avid reader to digest and interpret its words’
The Puppet Master


What is your favorite movie? Is it an epic film? Is it fantasy, romance, or horror? Whatever the type, you surely remember the events that took place in it and, more importantly, you remember the characters that caused them.

You surely don’t remember the type of trees or the direction the wind was blowing when the queen of the elves rejected the One Ring at the Lord of the Rings movie. You do remember, however, when Frodo was standing before her, and you surely remember the inner struggle she felt and how she almost failed, but didn’t.

You don’t remember, I’m sure, how many people Chucky killed in the first 3 movies (if you do you might need professional help). You do remember, however, who Chucky was, and you remember the child he was after, and perhaps the child’s mother.

And I’m sure you don’t remember which way Nettie went when she was kicked away from Albert and Celie’s home, in The Color Purple, but you do remember Nettie, Shug, and Sofia, and what each one of them represented.

Now, what does each one of your friends represent in your life?
Think of your enemies, opponents, nemesis, however you want to call them, and what does each one of them represent to you. How has each one of these people shaped your life? Think also how have YOU SHAPED YOUR LIFE in response to what these people have represented in your eyes?

Take a minute to think of these, and analyze your life as if it was your favorite film.

…

Think of how you see yourself, how you would describe yourself before continuing.

Think…

Now, think of what role have you played in other’s people’s lives, and how you have helped shape and mold the way they see the world. Who have you been, and what have you represented?

Have you been the loyal sidekick always ready to lend your aid? Have you been the stalwart guardian watching someone's back? How about a benevolent scholar always giving the advice needed, or the wise mentor teaching the ropes? Have you portrayed a fickle dancer, a clumsy bufoon or a charming entertainer? Have you been the street whore, the evil queen, the hated witch, or the murderous assassin of the heart? Maybe you have been just an insignificant passerby like many others, part of a huge crowd of forgotten faces...

Are you, or have you been who you think you should’ve been?

Think now of the role you want to play in the lives of others…and start doing it today!

Lesson learned: Focus on what I want to be to others rather than what I want others to be to me.

Hurt less...

'It really doesn't matter if the person who hurt you deserves to be forgiven. Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself. You have things to do and you want to move on.'

-Real Live Preacher

The memory is still fresh, like the scent of your favorite perfume, of that one moment when he/she hurt you. That moment when those words were pronounced, and like a poisoned dagger cleaving the chest of its victim, you were in deep pain.

It is hard to ignore, as much as we try, for a wounded leg will make you limp even if you stop paying attention to it.

What exactly happened that made you feel so? What hurt you? I have to say no one hurt you but yourself, for it is your view of things that has made you feel this way.

So, open up your eyes and your mind, and try to see more of that particular event than the stuff you have chosen (consciously or unconsciously) to remember. Things will seem so different then.

Did you feel unimportant? Why so, what made you feel that way? Were you ignored, or did you just feel you were ignored because you wanted all attention to yourself?

Were you laughed at, or did people try to laugh WITH you, but you took it the wrong way?

Whatever happened, there’s always at the very least two sides to a coin, so will you choose to dwell in the gloom of defeat or bask in the light of forgiveness and reconciliation?

Forgive. It is a learning process and it takes all of our lives to become really proficient. That way your wound will start to heal, and your burden will become less cumbersome.

Lesson learned: Ignoring your wound will only help spread the infection. Deal with it, heal it and continue your journey to maturity.

Pursuing happiness...

‘Happiness is not a destination. It is a method of life.’
-Burton Hills


Funny, isn’t it, that we spend most of our entire lives in the pursuit of that elusive thing we call happiness? And yet, somehow, it always seems to be able to avoid us.

Could you say you are one of those hard-working people, one of those dreamers who strive against all odds daily to achieve the happiness we all want? Could you truly say that you are one of those?

Then you are a fool.

Why do we have to think of happiness as something that ought to be pursued? Is there a need to go out hunting for it, to climb a cliff or cross a river to attain it? Do we have to fight for it? Reach into harm's way to get it? It seems that way, for we make it seem that way.

Close your eyes right now, just for a single minute. Breathe in, relax, breathe out…

Relax…

Now, after opening up your eyes and forgetting about all around you just think. What do you possess, or what around you makes you happy. You have been perhaps ‘too busy’ to see that just the flowers growing in your garden, that seeing your dog wagging its tail this morning, and that seeing a little sunlight of the few rays that escaped through the dense clouds in the sky can make you feel happy.

Perhaps watching your partner sleeping and cuddling in between the sheets like an innocent child, watching a cartoon, or reading a book have made you feel happy too.

Maybe even arriving on time to work, seeing a co-worker smiling, or just plain, good health can make you feel happy.

Live this very moment! Think of the things in your life that you should be happy about, and don’t be ungrateful with yourself.


Lesson learned: Finding joy in everything you do will make you richer, and happier than all the riches in the world.

One year…

"True friendship, unlike love, always lasts forever."

-Anonymous

"A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart, and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words."

-Anonymous

Time seems to pass by so slowly when you’re suffering…
Yet it does so fast when we’re enjoying life!

This last year has been a year of much introspection, of getting to know myself better, and to see things differently. It’s been a year of becoming stronger after healing wounds that have been inflicted by others, and by me.

After careful evaluation of the events that have transpired I can surely say I have been a traveler, a journeyman who has traversed from the deep valleys of love, to the uncertain waters of betrayal. I’ve crossed the jungles of despair, the deserts of solitude and have lost myself in the dense woods of uncertainty. I have survived a relationship conceived in hell, almost sunk myself in the swamps of emotional blunting.
In the end, and thanks to you my friends, I have been rescued and brought to walk again along the plains of eternal and unconditional friendship.

Thank you all for being there for me,

Thank you Marielys, for filling my life with laughter…
Gladys, for honesty like I’ve never seen before…
Jaime, for trying to understand me…
Ivonne, for always saying ‘yes’…
Ada, for humbly being the victim of my jokes…
Limaries, for all the memories…
Toby(my dog), for love unconditional…
‘Carlos(Javier, Johan and Eric)’, for joining the ride of my life…
Luis Daniel, for being the sweetest guy alive…
Pablillo, for putting up with my failures…
Danny, for all the help…
Nietzsche, for keeping me on my toes…
Idamis, for watching my back when I went blind…
Eva, for reminding me that miracles happen when you believe…
Humberto, for seeing the best of me…
Alkelis, for friendship that transcends time and distance…
Brian(Athos), for being more than a brother…
Jorge(Aramis), your faith gives me strength…
Frankie(D’Artanian), for music that moves my heart…
Whitten, for being the perfect nemesis…
Justin, for being fair and just…
Roberto Victor, for being the best of friends…
Armando, for all the joy…
Cynthia, for being my stalwart defender…
Jometh, for a song that touched me…
Laudy(Junito), for inspiring so much in me…
Miguel, for being honest when I needed it…
Angel & Emil, for all the good times…
Rafa, for being a true friend…
Danilo, for accepting me as I am…
Amarilis, for being as crazy as you are…

Thank you all for responding to my summons. And thanks for making my life one worthy of writing a book, one in which each one of you would deserve a chapter.

You have helped me throughout my life, and you have helped me be who I am today.

I am The Wolf,
the Puppet Master,
the Game Freak,
but, most importantly, I am...
…Your Friend

Lesson learned: "If all my friends were to jump off a bridge, I wouldn't jump with them, I'd be at the bottom to catch them"